One day at the university, someone invited me out for a drink, which led to my downfall. The cursed habit of alcohol caused me to fail my entire family. Now I am a professional and I work in the industrial sector, but I can’t stop drinking. It’s incredible how hard it is to quit.
A week ago I fell off the wagon, and there is something inside of me that is eating me up. I repent of what I have done, but unfortunately I go back and do it again.
Thank you for your messages. I have listened to them since I was a child.
Did you know that you practically quoted the Apostle Paul? He said, “I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.” (1) Even two thousand years ago human nature was the same. People of every culture have had to struggle with vices, addictions, bad habits and what can be called their “sinful nature.” You are not alone!
Both of my parents and my stepfather were alcoholics. Because of this, they failed me as parents as you say you have failed your family. As a child, I could never understand why my parents loved the bottle more than they seemed to love me.
Holidays could be particularly difficult. Since my parents didn’t have to work, they would start drinking early in the morning. By late afternoon they were drunk, which usually led to screaming and arguments. My stepfather had the tendency to throw things when he was drinking. One Christmas, he threw the decorated Christmas tree into the front yard. You can imagine what the neighbors thought of us!
My father died of cirrhosis of the liver, which comes from drinking large quantities of alcohol. There are thousands like him today who have been eaten up by alcoholism, their lives in shambles around them. They never intended to become alcoholics, as you didn’t.
Find an Alcoholics Anonymous group today! There you will find support to be able to quit for good. Do whatever it takes to attend those meetings. If your response is, “I don’t have time,” or “The meetings are too far,” or “I’m not like those people,” then resign yourself to children who can’t respect you and a life that will end badly. Millions of people have quit drinking, and you can too. But it will not be easy. How badly do you want it?
As for the sinful nature, it will always be with you. But the sin itself does not have to remain on your conscience. Jesus Christ wants to forgive you today for every time you’ve ever failed. He wants to give you a fresh start along with hope for a better future. Ask Him to forgive you of your sins and to live in your heart. Perhaps being free of the guilt will help give you strength for the difficult task you have ahead of you.
1 Rom 7:15